[The letter is slipped into his mailbox in the small hours of the morning. He might feel her approach, linger near the front of the house. She worries about him finding her here, about him being angry. She stays only long enough to put her letter into his box, then hurries away again.]
KURLOZ
1 HOP3 TH1S L3TT3R F1NDS YOU W3LL. 1 HOP3 YOUR3 NOT ST1LL 4NGRY. 1 KNOW YOU PROB4BLY 4R3, BUT ST1LL... 1 4M ST1LL 4T M3UL1NS. 1 4M PL4NN1NG TO ST4Y H3R3 UNT1L WH4T3V3R 1S WRONG W1TH YOUR GOD CH1LD 1S F1X3D. 1 DONT W4NT TO M4K3 TH1NGS H4RD3R FOR YOU.
1 N3V3R M34NT FOR US TO F1GHT. 1 HOP3 YOU KNOW TH4T. 1 ONLY M34NT FOR US TO T4LK, TO R34CH 4N UND3RST4ND1NG. 1 JUST W4NT3D TO SP3ND T1M3 W1TH YOU.
1M SORRY. 1 KNOW WH4T 1 4SK3D OF G4MZ33 W4S WRONG. 1 W4S SC4R3D, 4ND 1 4CT3D W1THOUT TH1NK1NG HOW 1T M1GHT HURT YOU. 1 D1DNT DO 1T ON PURPOS3. D3SP1T3 WH4T YOU S33M TO TH1NK, 1 W4SNT GO1NG TO D3NY YOU TH4T 4G41N. 1 COULDNT. SCOLD1NG M3 W4SNT N3C3SS4RY, BUT 1 C4N UND3RST4ND WHY YOU D1D 1T.
1 JUST W1SH TH4T YOU COULD UND3RST4ND MY F33L1NGS TOO. YOU S4Y TH4T 1 DONT H4V3 TO FORG1V3 H1M, BUT 1 DO H4V3 TO L1V3 W1TH TH3 CONS3QU3NC3S OF WH4T3V3R YOU D3C1D3 TO DO. 1 H4V3 TO L1V3 W1TH TH3 F4CT TH4T... 31TH3R 1 HURT YOU BY TRY1NG TO K33P YOU S4F3, OR 1 L3T YOU GO 4ND L1V3 1N T3RROR TH4T 1 4M GO1NG TO LOS3 YOU. 1 DONT H4V3 4NY OTH3R OPT1ONS.
3V3RY T1M3 YOU T4LK 4BOUT H3LP1NG H1M, 1 F33L S1CK TO MY STOM4CH. 1 C4NT NOT R3M3MB3R WH4T H3 D1D TO MY FR13NDS. SOM3T1M3S 1T F33LS L1K3 YOU W4NT TO BRUSH TH4T 4S1D3 FOR TH3 S4K3 OF K33P1NG YOUR F4M1LY. 1 HOP3 TH4TS NOT TH3 C4S3. 1 DONT 4CTU4LLY KNOW. FOR 4LL YOU S4Y TH4T YOU 4CKNOWL3DG3 HOW H3 HURT M3, 1T N3V3R F33LS TH4T 1T HOLDS 4NY W31GHT W1TH YOU. 1F YOU C4NT HOLD H1M 4CCOUNT1BL3 FOR 3V3N TH4T, HOW 4M 1 SUPPOS3D TO TRUST YOU TO PROT3CT YOURS3LF? 4T WH4T PO1NT WOULD YOU 4CTU4LLY S4Y TH4T 3NOUGH 1S 3NOUGH 4ND PUSH H1M 4W4Y?
1 C4NT POSS1BLY KNOW TH3 4NSW3RS TO THOS3 QU3ST1ONS. 1 C4NT 3V3N B3 H3R3 TO W1TN3SS THOS3 4NSW3RS MYS3LF. 1 L1V3 4 WORLD 4W4Y FROM YOU, WH3R3 1T T4K3S D4YS FOR 4NY N3WS TO R34CH M3. 1F 4NYTH1NG W3R3 TO H4PP3N, 1T WOULD B3 OV3R 4ND DON3 W1TH B3FOR3 1 3V3R 3V3N H34RD OF 1T. DO YOU KNOW HOW H3LPL3SS TH4T F33LS? TO KNOW YOU COULD B3 1N D4NG3R 4ND 1 C4N ONLY S1T WH3R3 1 4M 4ND W41T FOR TH3 OUTCOM3? 4ND TH3 W41T1NG GO3S ON 4ND ON... 1 F33L L1K3 1 WOULD B3 MOR3 4T 34S3 S1TT1NG 1N W41T OF MY OWN 3X3CUT1ON.
1F YOU S4Y TH4T YOU UND3RST4ND 4LL OF TH1S TH3N 1 W1LL L34V3 1T 4T TH4T. TH1S 1S M3 L3TT1NG GO. YOU C4N DO WH4T YOU W4NT W1TH H1M. 1 WONT BR1NG 4NY OF TH1S UP 4G41N 4ND 1 WONT TRY TO STOP YOU. 1 W1LL ONLY 4SK ON3 MOR3 T1M3 TH4T YOU PL34S3 B3 C4R3FUL. 1 P1TY YOU SO MUCH. 1 DONT KNOW WH4T 1 WOULD DO W1THOUT YOU. 1 DONT W4NT TO F1ND OUT.
[backdated to mid-february]
KURLOZ
1 HOP3 TH1S L3TT3R F1NDS YOU W3LL. 1 HOP3 YOUR3 NOT ST1LL 4NGRY. 1 KNOW YOU PROB4BLY 4R3, BUT ST1LL... 1 4M ST1LL 4T M3UL1NS. 1 4M PL4NN1NG TO ST4Y H3R3 UNT1L WH4T3V3R 1S WRONG W1TH YOUR GOD CH1LD 1S F1X3D. 1 DONT W4NT TO M4K3 TH1NGS H4RD3R FOR YOU.
1 N3V3R M34NT FOR US TO F1GHT. 1 HOP3 YOU KNOW TH4T. 1 ONLY M34NT FOR US TO T4LK, TO R34CH 4N UND3RST4ND1NG. 1 JUST W4NT3D TO SP3ND T1M3 W1TH YOU.
1M SORRY. 1 KNOW WH4T 1 4SK3D OF G4MZ33 W4S WRONG. 1 W4S SC4R3D, 4ND 1 4CT3D W1THOUT TH1NK1NG HOW 1T M1GHT HURT YOU. 1 D1DNT DO 1T ON PURPOS3. D3SP1T3 WH4T YOU S33M TO TH1NK, 1 W4SNT GO1NG TO D3NY YOU TH4T 4G41N. 1 COULDNT. SCOLD1NG M3 W4SNT N3C3SS4RY, BUT 1 C4N UND3RST4ND WHY YOU D1D 1T.
1 JUST W1SH TH4T YOU COULD UND3RST4ND MY F33L1NGS TOO. YOU S4Y TH4T 1 DONT H4V3 TO FORG1V3 H1M, BUT 1 DO H4V3 TO L1V3 W1TH TH3 CONS3QU3NC3S OF WH4T3V3R YOU D3C1D3 TO DO. 1 H4V3 TO L1V3 W1TH TH3 F4CT TH4T... 31TH3R 1 HURT YOU BY TRY1NG TO K33P YOU S4F3, OR 1 L3T YOU GO 4ND L1V3 1N T3RROR TH4T 1 4M GO1NG TO LOS3 YOU. 1 DONT H4V3 4NY OTH3R OPT1ONS.
3V3RY T1M3 YOU T4LK 4BOUT H3LP1NG H1M, 1 F33L S1CK TO MY STOM4CH. 1 C4NT NOT R3M3MB3R WH4T H3 D1D TO MY FR13NDS. SOM3T1M3S 1T F33LS L1K3 YOU W4NT TO BRUSH TH4T 4S1D3 FOR TH3 S4K3 OF K33P1NG YOUR F4M1LY. 1 HOP3 TH4TS NOT TH3 C4S3. 1 DONT 4CTU4LLY KNOW. FOR 4LL YOU S4Y TH4T YOU 4CKNOWL3DG3 HOW H3 HURT M3, 1T N3V3R F33LS TH4T 1T HOLDS 4NY W31GHT W1TH YOU. 1F YOU C4NT HOLD H1M 4CCOUNT1BL3 FOR 3V3N TH4T, HOW 4M 1 SUPPOS3D TO TRUST YOU TO PROT3CT YOURS3LF? 4T WH4T PO1NT WOULD YOU 4CTU4LLY S4Y TH4T 3NOUGH 1S 3NOUGH 4ND PUSH H1M 4W4Y?
1 C4NT POSS1BLY KNOW TH3 4NSW3RS TO THOS3 QU3ST1ONS. 1 C4NT 3V3N B3 H3R3 TO W1TN3SS THOS3 4NSW3RS MYS3LF. 1 L1V3 4 WORLD 4W4Y FROM YOU, WH3R3 1T T4K3S D4YS FOR 4NY N3WS TO R34CH M3. 1F 4NYTH1NG W3R3 TO H4PP3N, 1T WOULD B3 OV3R 4ND DON3 W1TH B3FOR3 1 3V3R 3V3N H34RD OF 1T. DO YOU KNOW HOW H3LPL3SS TH4T F33LS? TO KNOW YOU COULD B3 1N D4NG3R 4ND 1 C4N ONLY S1T WH3R3 1 4M 4ND W41T FOR TH3 OUTCOM3? 4ND TH3 W41T1NG GO3S ON 4ND ON... 1 F33L L1K3 1 WOULD B3 MOR3 4T 34S3 S1TT1NG 1N W41T OF MY OWN 3X3CUT1ON.
1F YOU S4Y TH4T YOU UND3RST4ND 4LL OF TH1S TH3N 1 W1LL L34V3 1T 4T TH4T. TH1S 1S M3 L3TT1NG GO. YOU C4N DO WH4T YOU W4NT W1TH H1M. 1 WONT BR1NG 4NY OF TH1S UP 4G41N 4ND 1 WONT TRY TO STOP YOU. 1 W1LL ONLY 4SK ON3 MOR3 T1M3 TH4T YOU PL34S3 B3 C4R3FUL. 1 P1TY YOU SO MUCH. 1 DONT KNOW WH4T 1 WOULD DO W1THOUT YOU. 1 DONT W4NT TO F1ND OUT.
YOURS,
T3R3Z1